She was five and having a collosal tantrum... but all behaviour is a form of communication and truer than any words. So I took that moment to see her soul, to see the pain that is behind such actions. I let the love I have for her well up inside of me and shine though my eyes and be there in the gentleness of my hugs. And as my thoughts became calm I saw the same happen with her. It was as if we linked up in that moment, I became her anchor in that personal storm she was suffering. Then there we were, as if everything had suddenly become calm inside of her and the start of a baby smile spread over her cheeks.
When I'm triggered it is so very hard to have self control, I'm doing the actions, it is my behaviour but it's as if the gas peddle got stuck down and in that acceleration, in that momentum, the steering wheel gets all jammed up too. It's all fight or fight and it's so disappointingly primitive but I can't override it unless I have a friend to help me, to guide, to release that emotional pressure so that I can take back the steering and make good choices. Without someone to love me, to switch my higher brain back on, I'm temporarily stupid...
When we see one another, we read behaviour as the language of emotion. It speaks to us the same way words do and tells of what the other needs for health and wellness.